What to do with someone who has a bad case of the grumps and a point to prove

I am not an expert on cyberspace, but the other day I came across the term “troll”.  I think,  in the internet context,  it is a person who makes malicious, unreasonable comments on blogs and other conversation forums in order to provoke a response.   I’m not sure where the term originated, but it reminded me of the story from my childhood - the one about the troll who lives under a bridge and scares the family of goats who need to use the bridge to get to the green grass on the other side.  In my leadership roles, I am like those goats trying to get to the other side.

I have plans and goals and dreams.  And, like those goats, sometimes a troll pops out from under the bridge and confronts me.  I don’t like being confronted, especially not by a troll with a bad case of the grumps and a point to prove.  My instinct is to lower my head and start butting.However I am learning  (although it still takes concerted restraint) that when I am confronted I need to stop and ask some questions before I lower my head and butt the person to kingdom come.

• Is the grass on the other side actually mine to have or am I attempting to take something that belongs to someone else?   Am I trying to do someone else’s job, encroaching on their territory and being a know-it-all?  This kind of behavior on my part is enough to turn anybody into a troll and it is best for me to back away because someone is about to get hurt.
• If the grass on the other side is legitimately mine to reach for,  then I need to determine whether the person confronting me is simply providing feedback or perhaps just disagreeing with my viewpoint.  If so then I should engage in healthy debate, as I may very well learn something.
• Is the person genuinely a troll – someone who is being maliciously unreasonable and trying to provoke a response? If so, my best strategy is to ignore them and keep right on moving to the other side.  Proverbs 4:23 says “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” I should guard my heart and not allow them to undermine my confidence.   Nor should I let them draw me into a fight.  It will only distract me and slow me down.

Question: How do you respond when confronted regarding something you plan to do? I invite you to enter into the conversation and leave a comment below.